Amazing afternoon and night. I finally got rid of the rental and picked up my new(er) hot pink volvo. It looks amazing, and I need to name her still, but she drives like a champ, and I'm so excited. I feel like I'm seventeen again, almost. Michael and I went to Outback for dinner, and it was amazing and fantastic and it didn't make my stomach hurt this time at all. I drove us back to our apartment and then he drove us to the theater to see Superman Returns. It was good, and mostly it just reaffirmed my adoration for Kevin Spacey. I suppose it's genetic, as my mom seems to be under his spell as well. We had a great night, despite the idiots around us, and I am just so happy lately.
He called me just to say he loves me. That was it.
I've been journaling, and I need to post some pictures of my pages tomorrow, along with a picture of me with the new car.
Things are looking up.
I often think about two years ago. Where the past two years have taken me, and how I've changed into who I've become. I can't believe how naive I used to be, but I know I will feel the same way in a few years about how I am now. Two years ago, I sat in smoky coffee houses on velvet sofas with Laura, and we laughed and giggled, and vienna sausages meant love. I had no idea what love was of course, or how amazing it could feel; the surge of power and the gasp of losing it all and being so out of control. I sometimes miss driving with Louise's sunroof open and letting Elliott Smith fill the car, but then I recall the emptiness and how lost I felt on so many of those nights. I don't really wonder if I will ever feel that way again because it isn't something to worry about. I feel like I have almost found my place.
Friday, June 30, 2006
Things feel empty and void at the old journal, so it is time for a fresh start. I started a new paper journal, and I will start a new online version of it here, along with knitting, and pictures, and probably more writing when school starts or the girls get back from overseas.